Langsung ke konten utama

Senyum Tersembunyi

--kepada Ampera



entah bagaimana aku dapat melukiskan wajahmu
mejameja retak ketika dimulai garis pertama
yang membentuk sudut lengkung lehermu

aku tidak akan mengawali atau mengingat
arsiran yang dimuarakan ke sarafkulitmu
mungkin kau akan peka ketika melihatnya

tapi di sinilah gambarmu akan benar-benar bicara
karena kertas ini yang meminta wajahmu yang basah

ingatlah ketika
tanganku mesti senantiasa lembab dan berlumut.
lalu kau hanya diam dan berkata
:
"hatikulah yang tersenyum sebenarnya
bibir tipis dengan gincu pucat ini
hanyalah tipudaya. kalau kauingin melihat bagaimana
senyum itu menetas
masuklah ke dalam bajuku
lalu kau akan menemui sepasang pisau
untuk memotong rusukku yang tumbuh liar
di dalamnya mengalir darah dari segala
galau dan risau. maka sumbernya adalah hati
ltulah senyumanku yang paling tersembunyi"

aku makin gemetar
yang kulihat melalui lubanglubang
yang kasap cahaya
semua menganak dari hatimu

inilah sungai
sebagai sumber yang amat abadi
dari dadamu yang banyak pertanda
senyummu dapat kubelah
lalu aku simpan
di dada : tempat yang katamu tersembunyi



palembang, 20-21 maret 2010
Label:

Komentar

Posting Komentar

hembusan yang akan disampaikan pada nona-angin

Postingan populer dari blog ini

Choices

There will always be the first time for everyone. The first time to hear, the first time to feel, the first time to move, the first time to breathe and cry, the first time to drink, the first time to eat, the first time to respond, the first time to play, the first time to play together and solve the very own problem, the first time to enter school, the first time to teach, the first time to talk and engage with numerous audience, the first to be and do anything. . .till it becomes one day. . .the thing that was hard and challenging, could become a piece of cake. It takes courage, it takes sweat and tears, it takes sleepless nights, it takes restless days, it takes commitment, it takes everything. Maybe it takes your happiness away either. It may seem scary and it may seem crazy. It requires self and stress management. I always have choices amongst these options. I commence to reflect. Back then, I love to  compare people, wether it would be worth it or not at all. I compare A to B...
Posting Komentar
Baca selengkapnya

The Most Precious Thing

To my fiancé, thank you for being a strong man even when hard times still hit that hard. Your 'cegil' is so proud of you. Dear Dadda K, to be with you has taken me to love myself more. Thank you for being gentle and listening to me and us. I have never felt less as a woman because I finally found my real power. Through the peaks and valleys, through the lengthy journey, I do believe the right train will never pass us by. In this horse year, let's be more kind to each other. Let kindness be the beginning of our story. Dear Daddy K, there were moments I might be afraid of losing us. The worries somehow spiraling. At the end I have to decide and take an action of not letting the hassle consuming me more. The peace, positivity, and tenderness are greater. This morning I looked at myself through the mirror. I asked, "who is this girl I see?" It instantly brought me back to you. I am loved, and your actions are the living proof. It's not only a love letter. I wrote ...
Posting Komentar
Baca selengkapnya

The Awakening of New Energy

This one week, my mind buzzed. I know I had a lot to express. I always feel the urge to talk to people and barely know when to stop. I love creating world with words. Words are playground to me. Sometime I could slide, hop, roll forward, slither, or simply sit and watching people passing by. It's not a bout fun, but it's the awareness of creating more and more. I will try to invest 1 hour each day to write, to think, to get lost, to be found, to express, and write again. Over and over. I hope there will be more people connect and read me. Insya Allah 🤍
Posting Komentar
Baca selengkapnya