Langsung ke konten utama

AH LADINGKU


Ah, dalam liang matamu, musim sudah berubah menjadi nafsu dalam perburuan yang sengit tentang hutan. Orang-orang berkuda dan mengibaskan cambuk untuk berlari cepat. Aku menemukan tanah-tanah yang terapal oleh jejak, tapi bukan untuk mengingat kemana arahmu. Di hutan, pohon-pohon itu nyinyir dengan senyuman kekal kita yang lekat pada daun. Aku mengenakan rok warna hijau, lalu kutempeli gambar manis wajahmu.

Nafas ini bau sungsang dan akan lenyap bersama kobar api yang tertembus oleh panah. Memburu memang tak pernah disepakati untuk dilarang di tanah ini. Maka aku pula menyimpulkan bahwa menemukan jalan yang lurus untuk mencapai pangkal kaki dan igamu adalah semacam misi, sebuah nasihat yang diturunkan oleh nenek moyang kepada cucunya.

Namun alangkah pedihnya matahari ini merobek lengan dan kulitku. Suara lengking ini tak akan mungkin sampai pada dewa yang meredam perih. Barangkali aku akan bicara pada lading yang kian tumbuh dalam leher. Lading yang tak pernah dimandikan oleh perburuan akan terlihat polos dan tumpul katamu.


Lantas aku mesti bergerak ke bawah pohon untuk mengumpulkan tetes darah, menampungnya di wadah yang kering, lalu diusapkan ke ujung yang belum terasah tajam? Ah ladingku.


2014 

Komentar

Postingan populer dari blog ini

The Awakening of New Energy

This one week, my mind buzzed. I know I had a lot to express. I always feel the urge to talk to people and barely know when to stop. I love creating world with words. Words are playground to me. Sometime I could slide, hop, roll forward, slither, or simply sit and watching people passing by. It's not a bout fun, but it's the awareness of creating more and more. I will try to invest 1 hour each day to write, to think, to get lost, to be found, to express, and write again. Over and over. I hope there will be more people connect and read me. Insya Allah 🤍

Choices

There will always be the first time for everyone. The first time to hear, the first time to feel, the first time to move, the first time to breathe and cry, the first time to drink, the first time to eat, the first time to respond, the first time to play, the first time to play together and solve the very own problem, the first time to enter school, the first time to teach, the first time to talk and engage with numerous audience, the first to be and do anything. . .till it becomes one day. . .the thing that was hard and challenging, could become a piece of cake. It takes courage, it takes sweat and tears, it takes sleepless nights, it takes restless days, it takes commitment, it takes everything. Maybe it takes your happiness away either. It may seem scary and it may seem crazy. It requires self and stress management. I always have choices amongst these options. I commence to reflect. Back then, I love to  compare people, wether it would be worth it or not at all. I compare A to B...

The Most Precious Thing

To my fiancé, thank you for being a strong man even when hard times still hit that hard. Your 'cegil' is so proud of you. Dear Dadda K, to be with you has taken me to love myself more. Thank you for being gentle and listening to me and us. I have never felt less as a woman because I finally found my real power. Through the peaks and valleys, through the lengthy journey, I do believe the right train will never pass us by. In this horse year, let's be more kind to each other. Let kindness be the beginning of our story. Dear Daddy K, there were moments I might be afraid of losing us. The worries somehow spiraling. At the end I have to decide and take an action of not letting the hassle consuming me more. The peace, positivity, and tenderness are greater. This morning I looked at myself through the mirror. I asked, "who is this girl I see?" It instantly brought me back to you. I am loved, and your actions are the living proof. It's not only a love letter. I wrote ...