Lebaran Day

It's time to say goodbye to Ramadhan and tomorrow is going to be Lebaran day. Each year, a one-month-fasting becomes a lifestyle to reset our body after having eleven months to work hard, burn the midnight oil chasing the balance of work, life, and prayer I should add. The Ramadhan this year had a special meaning to me for I dealt with myriad of responsibilities, to be the person in charge for 3 events in my office in one week, participating in an exhibition in education, preparing school portfolio, doing lots of side hustle until I had a belated grieving when one of my uncles passed away, preparing the experiments for PBL Learning at school about volcanoes (and preparation shall never betray us), the holiday program for the sensory class and we attempted to dig more of experiments with kids, preparing and editing a school book, completing my Montessori final exam, preparing the launch of our home-made soap bar for our first bazaar, and many more. I thank Allah for His mercy and guidance, to make all the sleepless nights paid off and make the challenges wrapped into one of most beautiful tests I coped with. I do remember about these wise messages about, "Instead of removing the ocean, Allah part it when Moses and his followers acrossed the ocean and run away from Firaun. Instead of removing the fire, Allah make the fire cold that could never burn Abraham." Instead of removing all the obstacles, Allah make me learn numerous significant lessons that will save me in the future, insya Allah. I do believe, I also witness my very own journey to develop. 

Lebaran this year, has a special meaning as well. This is going to be my very first time of not returning to my hometown nor staying in my Aunt's house since she and her family flew to her husband's hometown to celebrate Lebaran Day. Am I sad? Unfortunately, yes. Does this make me lonely? I don't think so because I am supported by my parents, friends, and my daddy K who managed to make me feels like I belong to Jakarta. Insya Allah, I'll be gathering with my whole family. One of my cousins sent me some pictures of our big family. I am deeply content to see everyone gathers even if it's once a year. My cousin wrote a brief caption and it says, "The Family of A Syatar Oesman bin (son of) Pangeran Oesman (my great grandfather). My great grandpa is the son of Pangeran Saba'in. Both Pangeran Saba'in and Pangeran Oesman were the Deputi of Musi Banyuasin, South Sumatera. They got this honorable and respectful mention since they led the region. Pangeran means Prince by the responsibility given to them. 

It is quite intriguing to discuss about who were our ancestors in their life in the past. My Mum also has a unique honorable mention, Nyayu, by blood. Nyayu is given to descendants of Kiai, the person who's in charge to regulate the Religion Department in Kesultanan Palembang Darussalam. My grandpa from my Mum named after Kiagus too and it's for male while Nyayu is for the female. I also am named after Nyayu, but both my parents decided not to use Nyayu on my birth certificate. Am I happy with all of naration? Frankly speaking, I'm more happy to be raised and nurtured by my happy family, and I wish I could be able to raise and nurture my sons and daughters in the future with the wisdom we have in our family eclectically. I am far from being perfect, and I hope people will remember me as a great woman specifically for the spirit and work of art I created, that I am a devoted life learner and will be gladly to transfer the knowledge to everyone who needs it. Insya Allah.

Ya Allah, I'm just a little girl who feels so tiny without You. My face turns brighter when I am closer to You. Insya Allah, You will answer my prayers. Amiin. May this Lebaran Day (Eid) bring us peace, joy, and endless blessings.