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P E T U A L A N G

Apa yang tak dapat kau kenali dalam dirimu?
Lipatan pertama pada bibir adonan gyoza yang terlampau tebal,
sentuhan yang tak disengaja, pada gagang wajan yang panas saat menggoreng, lalu membakar kulitmu,
paparan uap dari dalam pinggan yang menanak hari-hari, juga kenangan biar tidak basi,
atau peluh yang menetes dari wajahmu sebagai isyarat esok pun terasa asin dan getir, meski tanpa garam kau tabur?

Jakarta memanjang ribuan kilometer
Pengecut dan maling berseliweran
Namun kau, masih gemar menyendiri
menghilang dalam ingatan
Hutan yang lebat adalah kesadaran yang terbius dalam kata-kata, pencarian yang sia-sia, kepulangan yang tertunda

Barangkali ketika kau bertualang lebih dalam di hutan itu
Kematian semakin jauh kehilangan jejakmu
Lalu menunggu dengan tabah di sepanjang musim penghujan
dan bulan Juni yang gugur begitu pelan


Jekardah, Juni 2020
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