Dum Medium Silentium

Hi Daddy It's been the second year we celebrate your special day. Here’s to another trip around the sun. Your existence grants all of my wishes. Im grateful the universe brought us together. To know you is to love you, to be friend with you, to trust you, to grow together with you. Although my calendar tells me that today I have to tell you how much I love you, I hope you know I love you every day of the year. Happiest birthday, Daddy. May you be blessed, with joy and happiness, truly blessed. It's a year of growth and new delight. May your birthday shine, ever so bright!  You are loved. I love you more than the bad days ahead of us, more than any hard conversations we will have, more than the inch and miles between us, more than the smiles - tears - and each memorable moments we have before we close our eyes at night. Let this message be read and remembered by people who celebrate life, love, commitment, 'afiyah, mutual understanding, and perseverance. Insya Allah

Some might value insecurity was unkind to them, some might value insecurity was a blessing. I can't tell you which part of group I'm in. For me it is a double-sided coin. It feels unkind when I was unsure about my own self-worth. I attempted to figure out my own quality in lieu of the confidence crisis. I overanalyzed things that is actually good for my own progress. I somehow was afraid of facing the rapid changes, the inflexibility, being controlled, being rejected, being misunderstood, and many more. That's how I love working all alone rather than as a team, it's draining.  It wasn't on a sunny day, in the weekend, nor in peace when I found out the feeling of being uncertain could lead me to a person with a mental victim who couldn't get up and do her best for her very own life. This is a process of living I should say, when one is observing her journey, analyzing her milestone, doubting her believe, thinking and reflecting about the purpose of each scenario....

I was stunned by my own journey these past 15 years and how I became more aware of whom I built my interactions with. This journey served me the ups and downs. This journey, took me to a whimsical experience of meeting new people, collaborating with new ideas, arguing with different point of view, doing the best in achieving 'il sueno imposible', and letting go what doesn't belong the chapter. In this journey, people showed their colors and I learned to digest it gradually. It was uneasy, it triggered a lot of things from me deep down inside, encouraged me to change and to be humble.  In this journey, I met great people that somehow made me questioned and doubted myself a lot. And I thank Allah it became my inspiration to be a better human day by day. I doubted myself, I searched for the answer and it was found within myself. Somehow I got lost but I believe I will not waste my time to just wander nor to never come back.  One person looked great at least to me, I compared t...

It was a small talk between me and Daddy K about the journey we've been through so far, about the ups and downs, about growing and progressing, about welcoming the updated ones and letting go the obsolescence, about living that reminds us also about death, about grieving, lamenting, accepting, forgiving, and doing our best too. It was beyond my imagination how us, the two heads with different value and background could decide to choose to stay and to stick to commitment. Just like other normal human, there were times we two questioned about making a right decision amidst the unceasing challenges. Each day, we make a move, we take a step, we breathe, and we pray so Allah will grant us strength to keep being strong, and to allow us to recognize this is the right one through His guidance and blessings.  Each time we open up our eyes, waking up from dreams and facing reality, life has become a special story. This is the story of how me and him deal with a single step each day until we ...

Hi Mutia. Happiest birthday my dearest self, and may God shower you love, courage, and happiness, success and win, peace, and integrity. Dear Mutia, this birthday becomes special since I was no longer celebrating this memorable moment by myself. I have friends who are ready to dance with me, Daddy K who becomes my first line guardian, my sister and brother who loves me, my parents who become my pillar, my students who make my life colorful and wonderful, and many more.  This is what my Daddy K tried to remind me of. He said "It's another time for you to evolve 365 days and I wish you have a pleasant memories more than the previous, I hope in this new turn our love shall continue to grow and we shall experience love, peace and, understanding...I wish you luck and all the good things u can ever imagine...HBD  to my dearest 🥂 ❣️and always know when you're sad that's truly ok, you'll be happy again very soon, and if you're knackered, rest and try one more time....

The night has fall, curled around, and settled In silence and peace, the moon flickered courageously and stars blinked naughty It was a rectangled room with a hanging rattan bulb where the cold took hold A wave of joyful energy gathered and helped me chanted, "this day came, we're filled with love and pleasure." We have shared sunrises and sunsets Conquering all fears, expressing the passage of time, enduring love, and tumbling in joy. I dove beneath the quilt Drifted into dreams  "Before two, I was one celebrating the innocence, the unsolved questions about why I was one, not two.  I was a foreigner, wandered with a self-made map In the North I would see the frosting winter, magical skies with ribbons of light In the East, I would see new days filled with promise, flashing out warm greetings In the South, days stretch long, bread freshly baked, and conversations about clumsy feet strolling through the field never ends In the West, trees trembled the rustling leaves....

Happy 2nd anniversary, Daddy K. May we grow in love, in patience, in harmony, in friendship, in genuineness, in honesty, and in a spirit to win and never lose hope. May becomes a significant month for both of us, it is our anniversary, my birthday, and your birthday as well. Some people may say May is the longest month amongst the other months. I could say yes and no at the same time. Yes that it will last in 31 days, and no since we celebrate 3 events.  This week we had a staycation. We didn't plan it, instead we decided to have one spontaneously. We were looking for a new environment to talk from heart to heart. It's been ages we haven't done it. We got a unique room, only 27sqm with high ceiling. The first floor is for the bathroom, kitchen, and family room while the second floor is where we found the bedroom. This room gave us a homey impression. We both hope that later, we will have a house we call home for our family soon. We will design the master bedroom that will b...

Dear Daddy K, I am touched by the way you sent me a gentle reminder of how significant patience is in our lives. I vividly remember we both relearned about to love and being loved, to have and maintain our patience while building up trust while we both had issues in trusting people, to articulate our vulnerability, to stick to our commitment and goals, and to water the clear intentions, etc. This is how I love us. Is it perfect? Of course not, but it won't stop us from growing in love and in patience.