Langsung ke konten utama

A Pair of Day : Morning and Night


: mama


kita barangkali menciptakan kesedihan
pada tiap waktu yang hampir pagi
langit menjadi pucat dan dingin dengan sebentuk kemurungan
di tubuh kita. lalu kau menyeru :
di atas sana pernah ada sepasang pendekar
yang mencintai bidadari dengan selapang-
lapangnya hati. langit terbentang
membentuk lingkaran yang bersembunyi
di balik kancing baju. langkah kaki ini
tidak pernah lupa menuju jantungmu yang
pernah kita tinggali, selama lima
atau bahkan sepuluh tahun lagi.

kita saksikan embun-embun dan sisa teriakan
menyelinap di dekat koridor kamar
dan jendela yang kita katupkan
pukul enam sore. "Af, sudah begitu lama
kau menanggung pertanyaan yang luput dari mimpi."

kita mengganti jadwal-jadwal bertatap muka.
dari mulut, surat-surat berangka ditelan.
namun aku melupakan sudut paling runcing
dari matamu. mataku tenggelam. dari tenggorokan
hal -hal gaib bermunculan. kita masing-
masing masih menata kesedihan. debu dan halusinasi
beterbangan menjadi bongkah-bongkah keangkeran malam hari.

dengan sedikit gumam yang sangat lucu
aku berangkat dari meja kerja
mengerucut di pundakmu
"esok kita masih hidup bukan?"


2012 mai, Depok

Komentar

Postingan populer dari blog ini

Choices

There will always be the first time for everyone. The first time to hear, the first time to feel, the first time to move, the first time to breathe and cry, the first time to drink, the first time to eat, the first time to respond, the first time to play, the first time to play together and solve the very own problem, the first time to enter school, the first time to teach, the first time to talk and engage with numerous audience, the first to be and do anything. . .till it becomes one day. . .the thing that was hard and challenging, could become a piece of cake. It takes courage, it takes sweat and tears, it takes sleepless nights, it takes restless days, it takes commitment, it takes everything. Maybe it takes your happiness away either. It may seem scary and it may seem crazy. It requires self and stress management. I always have choices amongst these options. I commence to reflect. Back then, I love to  compare people, wether it would be worth it or not at all. I compare A to B...

The Most Precious Thing

To my fiancé, thank you for being a strong man even when hard times still hit that hard. Your 'cegil' is so proud of you. Dear Dadda K, to be with you has taken me to love myself more. Thank you for being gentle and listening to me and us. I have never felt less as a woman because I finally found my real power. Through the peaks and valleys, through the lengthy journey, I do believe the right train will never pass us by. In this horse year, let's be more kind to each other. Let kindness be the beginning of our story. Dear Daddy K, there were moments I might be afraid of losing us. The worries somehow spiraling. At the end I have to decide and take an action of not letting the hassle consuming me more. The peace, positivity, and tenderness are greater. This morning I looked at myself through the mirror. I asked, "who is this girl I see?" It instantly brought me back to you. I am loved, and your actions are the living proof. It's not only a love letter. I wrote ...

The Awakening of New Energy

This one week, my mind buzzed. I know I had a lot to express. I always feel the urge to talk to people and barely know when to stop. I love creating world with words. Words are playground to me. Sometime I could slide, hop, roll forward, slither, or simply sit and watching people passing by. It's not a bout fun, but it's the awareness of creating more and more. I will try to invest 1 hour each day to write, to think, to get lost, to be found, to express, and write again. Over and over. I hope there will be more people connect and read me. Insya Allah 🤍