It's been 10 years after my hardest fall. Life was messy before 2016, but it even was messier since 2016. I had anxiety. It led me to GERD and mild depression. I wept alone in almost every single night. People said time would heal. Instead, it was a ticking bomb. I didn't have a really good history speaking about relationship. I tend to freeze and avoid conflicts. I learned that conflicts were traumatizing. I would not hesitate to avoid conflicts by pleasing people, repressing my emotion, putting aside my feelings, and keeping quiet when things didn't go right. Back in 2023, it was indeed a rollercoaster year as well. That year made me realize of what I need was to relearn, to label what had happened in my journey. It wasn't easy. It was messy. My health was getting worse. It was the year of lessons. The year when I decided to heal and comprehend that conflicts came not to scare, but to resolve. Conflicts shouldn't make people argue, but reconcile, conflicts shouldn't break the vow, but to stick to commitment. Being honest and speak about the truth equally matters. Dear life, it was beautiful to heal, to remain calm and peace, to choose to face the truth, to gradually stand for myself when no one stayed. I chose myself when things seemed chaos. I set boundaries when I dived too deep. I relearned that not all people are allowed to enter the life I rebuilt. Dear life, thank you.
It's 2026. This is a letter from me to myself 10 years ago. The fragments from you, it is safe now with me. You're my younger sister. You did a great job. You're loved always. For those who stays by my side, I truly deeply appreciate it. God and heaven bless you.
Xoxo
Ms. M
What life would be in the next 5 or 10 years? Should I write another letter for me in the next 10 years?
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