Dum Medium Silentium

Monday, it could be sunny and breezy Tuesday, could be gloomy and stormy Wednesday, you noticed it's partly cloudy, the rainbow was too shy to show Thursday, Mr Sun said, "Bonjour, Buenos dias!" Friday, let's have some fun! This was the time to rest Saturday, gonna be occupied Sunday, what about some workouts and sauna? The days were colorful But most of the time I didn't get along with Tuesday The ailments came for a visit on Tuesday Tuesday means overwhelmed and fatigue So I'd make a prayer, O Lord, please wake me up on Wednesday morning once I slept on Monday night Let alone Tuesday be muted.  Bye-bye, Tuesday!

Am I hurt Or is there anything I can do to repair something  Not to change But to understand that things can run differently  Not by lesson  But by repairing  Not to complain, but to check the nuts and bolts, to fasten it, to reposition it And when things go smoother, I will be able to see myself, to feel my own existence,  to take care of my needs, to breathe and face the morning sun and the uncertain night The last time I tried to be the best roses people ever seen and touched And I will never be lily who demands one I attempted to be a pond instead of ocean  When I noticed people face hardship to swim I sit.  I look myself in the eye.  Ya Allah, grant me kindness. Protect me from all the bitterness.  I want to be content and happy too, with your ridho. Amen

Today I was sad a little bit. I wept for several hours. Then, I read Quran, the only thing that could distract me from streaming the tears. I was exhausted.  I nearly skipped my dinner and drank less water. But I remember I could get reflux if I did it, I'll recover for a long time. I looked myself through the mirror. Damn, I looked terribly miserable, the look I loathed since I paid more to take care of myself. I question who I am, is this what I wanna be and do till rest of my life. I prayed to Allah to always guide me, shower me with love, and grant me peace and contentment.  So I gather my remaining energy to eat dinner, drink more water, and take shower. I was happy since today I was able to buy cute hair accessories, colorful, come with different size, with pattern and different fabric each.  I also bought coconut body butter. It smells good and softening. So I unboxed some of the hair clip. I chose the purple one, it worked by making me looked better. I put it on w...